I've not posted anything, or even looked at this site, in forever..but I deleted everything so I guess that doesn't matter anymore

..I spoke to my doctor..and I've my second meeting with a counselor in a week..
They've me on meds now
..I was diagnosed with depression. bulimia, and ocd/anxiety

..and I don't want this anymore.
I want this over. I want to stop hating me and throwing up everything I eat. Then I freak out after I take my meds because I want to vomit but I shouldn't if I want them to even have a possibility of working.
I'm sick of never being happy anymore.
I don't want to do anything anymore
I just want to sleep.
But I go to sleep sad and wake up sad
I hate that I started this..and now I don't know how to fix it